Ichi, Ichi Love!
by GoodLuckMother
Summary: What do you get when you have pastry theme's? You get RenjixOrihime one-shots of course! Read these two center around love and pastrys! DISCOUNTED
1. Chapter 1

_GoodLuckMotherFuckers- Enjoy! I do not own bleach_

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_Cherry Pie_

Orihime let out a string of giggles at the tattooed red headed man sitting in front of her in the crowded café, who was savagely eating a cherry pie with his hands, getting it all over his face. It was a sight to see, to those brave enough to watch.

When Orihime's giggles turned into hearty laughter, Renji gave a growl and snorted.

"You look like a wild boar! Feasting upon an innocent animal that came across you!" Orihime shouted with glee. Renji paused from his meal to look at the orange hair beauty.

"Um, thank you?

"_... should I be_ _insulted?" _Orihime giggled as she reached across the table to wipe the cherry filling off the grim reaper's face. "The filling looks like blood" she murmured as she wipe the face clean.

Renji swore he heard several gasps from the café customers that someone was brave enough to touch the cherry pie murderer.

Despite the heavy atmosphere in the room Orihime continue to clean the cherry filling off the grim reaper only to slightly pause before breaking off as another attack of giggles overcame her.

"Renji-kun! You're blushing!"

Renji growled standing up from table, "I am not! Shut up! Just shut up! It's that stupied pie!"

Several customers started to shriek and scurry away from the shouting tattooed man.

Needless to say, Renji and Orihime were not aloud back into the café again.


	2. Chapter 2

"Renji-kun is not the sharpest sword in the dojo, is he?"

"Shut up ass wipe!"

Inoue remained quiet as she watches the scene unfold in front of her. Leave it to Renji Abarai to turn chopsticks into a lethal weapon. "A normal everyday breakfast at the Urahara Shop" she mumbled to herself.

"Ouch!! Don't stab me there Renji! I need that hand! Hime-chan save me from this brute!"

"Leave her out of this! And die like a man!"

The healer couldn't help but also wonder where the residents of the Urahara shop got all there energy? Especially so early in the morning?

"Maybe it was from the morning sun? They must be like plants! Feeding off the sun, like vampires, plant vampires."

"Or maybe Aliens came down in the middle of the night and suck all there blood out and replace it with sugar!

_"Or maybe this is how a family behaves in the morning?"_ Inoue silently felt bittersweet emotions starting to overcome her. It's been so long since she had family meal…

"Renji knew that didn't him? He knew the cold apartment she lived in; day in and day out would never be a home to her.

_"Hey! Girl! Come to the Urahara shop in the mornings; we got too much food no one eats enough."_

Ururu looked up from her meal as she noticed the orange hair sitting across from her about to cry.

"Inoue-Chan? What... What's wrong?"

The quiet meek statement made annoying shivers go down Renji spine, and despite sitting AND forcefully shoving down two wooden chopsticks down a certain throat he mange to cast a concern look at Inoue.

"Why you making that face?"

That seem to be the final straw for Orihime who was so desperately to hold back her tears.

"Wow, making girls cry Renji; you're a big man you know that" Jinta lazy pronounced through a mouthful of pancakes.

"Shut up brat" Renji mutter darkly as he got off Urahara who was now gasping for air on the ground resembling a fish out of water.

"Inoue?" he quietly asked, sitting next to the tearful girl. What was he gonna do? All the girls he knew, kicked his butt or drank him under the table. He never handled a crying woman before! What to do!? What to do!?

_"Apples, in the pancakes. That's my favorite fruit"_ Orihime studied the now soggy apple pancakes. "_He made this for me."_

"Are you Okay?" Renji ask lowering his voice in attempt to make it more soothing.

"I'm just so happy Renji!"

Renji let out a small epée from the sudden surprise yell and even sudden surprise hug from the orange hair beauty.

"Uh.., I… Um, ah...."

Renji body froze as it became stiff in certain places.

"I think you broke Renji, Inoue-chan"

"Um…"


	3. Chapter 3

Renji found out he liked a lot of things in the human world, but he would be damn to hell and back, if he admitted it to anyone. But still, he felt enjoyment  
in many things, For example:

Alcohol was always fun to pass around... That is, the rare occasion he wasn't treated like a slave from his psycho path master Urahara.

He liked playing with that stick, that seem to make things on the TV move, when he did. What did the brats called it again? Mii? Fee?! Oh hell! A stick  
is a stick! (1)

But there were also things Renji did not like, for example.

Two annoying retards and there version of flirting!

"Hey you midget give me back that slice!" yelled a furry strawberry acrossthe room. The said midget just stuck out her tongue, and started playing cat and mouse with said furry strawberry. "Dammit Ichigo! Your so getting slow, your lucky I'm not a hollow" Rukia mutter jumping over a even more upsetIchigo.

Renji let out a long mental sign. "Every ** time" At first when he first saw the signs of there flirting. If you call it that. He was... hurt- **! Not hurt! He was not some cliche human women. He was Renji, toughest soul reaper around! He was just mentally injured. Yeah! That's it!

Who the fuck was he kidding?

No one, that's who.

Fuking great.

Renji sighed for the hundredth time as he looked down at his math homework, they were supposed to study. A study date between friends at the kind hearted Inoue home. Not have freakish version of flirting. Speaking of Inoue, why isn't she back yet from the bakery? Not that he didn't care... much that is. Renji couldn't help but quietly admit to himself the bubbly human was a other thing he-

THUD

"Pervert!"

"What the hell Rukia! What the hell!"

"You grabbed my boob you moron!"

"What?! I did no such thing!" A now blushing Ichigo shouted. "You ran into me! It slipp- Hey! If you hadn't stole my pizza I wouldn't have- I mean... Hell! I can't see them! How the hell am I supposed to know what I'm grabbing if I can't see them!"

Renji raised a thin brow; he was a little impressed Ichigo managed to stutter that much. a LITTLE was the keyword.

Rukia gave a soft hum in response. Showing no signs she even heard Ichigo's little speech. But if you knew Rukia as long as he did. You knew she was just planning her counter attack.

_3 _  
"HOW ABOUT YOU SEE THIS!" Rukia fisted a now soggy piece of pizza into Ichigo's face.

2

1

"GOD DAMMIT!"

"Okay I had enough of this for today" Renji slowly got up from the small table. Quietly placing his books in his bag, not even being notice by the twoyelling soul reapers. Alone as usual.

"Figures, nothing ever changes."

He could feel himself sighing again, both mentally and physically. He didn't even know that was possible! And yet, here he was doing it, on his way back to

Urahara.

Sigh

"Renji-Kun! Oh Renji-kun"

"Now what..." he half heartedly muttered, turning around.

"Inoue-chan!"

"Shit, Shit, Shit, I forgot about HER."

Renji paused in his movement to let the busty women catch up with him. He notice she carried different arrangements of bags in her hands.

"Hn, no wonder it took her so long."

"Your not going, are you Renji-kun?" an out of breath Inoue spoke.

"Uh, yeah... I remember I had some chorus to do back at Urahara's" Renji muttered under his breath suddenly feeling guilty by the sudden sadness in Inoue eyes.

He didn't like seeing that. He still felt guilty making Inoue cry the other day at breakfast. Even though she said she was happy, that it was tears of joy. He didn't like to think of her in any type of pain.

"I see then." Orihime murmured now looking down at the ground. "Or is it... Ichigo and Rukia's behavior?"

Renji blinked, it was a quiet comment but he still heard it. He think he could feel worse, but as always HE WAS BLOODY WRONG!.

"Is it that obvious?" he grumble scratching the back of his head. Inoue raised her head to forcefully shook her head. "No, not at all... It's just. I sort of feel the same way sometimes." she whisper. "Why do you think I went to the bakery when we already ordered pizza" she gave a sad laugh after that Renji  
couldn't help but join in. He liked her laugh, other thing he liked he realized.

"Well aren't we great pair?" Renji toothily grinned after catching his breath.

"Are you sure you have to go back... I was hoping after we study we could try some of these deserts I got from the bakery." A now stuttering Inoue. "I-I know you haven't tried a lot pastries, in this world...and I, I well..." Inoue stammered.

Renji stared thoughtfully for a moment, before grinning proudly. "I would be honored to try them with you Inoue-chan."

"Oh fantastic!"

"But let's take our sweet ass time!"

"Right!"


	4. Author Note

_GoodLuckMotherFuckers: Hello, if you were wondering what stories I will update, or what I plan on writting next, there will be an "Author To Do List" on my profile, if you are curious what comes out next. Thank you, and have a nice day!_


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